Dear KidsOutAndAbout readers:
My first job out of college was as the managing editor at a small medical publishing company in New York City. I worked alongside Steve, our associate editor. My strength was structure and rhythm; his was medical accuracy and detail. We made a good team.
One day, Steve walked into my office waving some printed pages. “Deb, can you do that
thing you do, so I can check out the science?” “What thing?” I asked. “You know,” he said, “that magic you work where the writing comes in muddy and you turn it into something clear, logical, and even fun to read.”
I’ve never forgotten that moment. Not just because it felt great to be seen, but because of what it taught me about leadership.
We’re surrounded by people with unique strengths. As parents, friends, or leaders, one of the most
powerful things we can do is notice those strengths and say them out loud. When we do, people rise. Kids rise. They lean into what they’re good at, and their futures get brighter. It’s not magic—it’s just the natural result of being seen and valued—but it feels like it.
Over the years, as I raised kids, built a business team, and worked within various communities, I kept returning to that lesson: Leadership isn’t about having a title, it’s about paying attention.
You can’t run a family or a business unless you know who you’re with and what makes them shine. And once you start validating others (“You know that thing you do? Please do that!”) you become a leader. Even if you're just leading someone to be more themselves.
So today, find a reason to start a conversation: “You know that thing you do?...” You won't see it right away, but trust me: Their horizon will glow.
—Debra Ross, publisher of KidsOutAndAbout.com, co-author of The Eclipse Effect: How to Seize Extraordinary Moments to Build Strong Communities
